It may seem awkward having another person care for your child while you are working at home. Your nanny may find it uncomfortable to work with a parent so close by all the time. Her frustration can stem from the child's behaviour, as well as your wanting to become involved with what is happening at any given time.
The Challenges of Mommy and Nanny Together
A child's behaviour with her nanny can sometimes be challenging when she knows mommy is home. She will often test boundaries, knowing that what nanny doesn’t allow her to do, mommy will. Or she will insist that “mommy do it” rather than nanny. Your maternal drive may tell you to jump in, keeping you from your work, and causing your nanny to feel she isn't making the right decisions. So how do you avoid this dilemma?
Set Boundaries while Nanny is There
Right from the start, and whenever nanny is on duty, have the boundaries between you and your child clear and set. Have your work space out of sight. If your child can not see you, she will forget you are there and you will not be distracted from your work. Be on a different floor or in a closed off room, and let your child know that she is not allowed to disturb you while you are working. “While nanny is here, she is in charge. I am working and do not want to be interrupted. Whatever you need, you are to ask nanny.” Your child will test this rule, so be clear, firm and consistent in your response.
Get Nanny and Child out of the House
Find activities for your child and nanny that involve leaving the house. Sign up for music lessons, find out about playgroups at the recreation centre and public swim time at the local pool. Know when story time is at the library. Arrange play dates with friends and other nannies. Get memberships to museums and aquariums. The less your child and nanny are around, the fewer distractions for everyone.
Set Clear Time Limits
One of the joys working from home is you do have more time to spend with your child. Take advantage and join your child and nanny for lunch, or choose to settle your child down for nap, but let your child know that you have a particular amount of time, and then you need to go back to work. Again, be clear and consistent on this - for both of you!
Don't Interfere with Nanny and Child
Your nanny will do things differently from you - it's okay! She will cut sandwiches differently, read stories differently, and yes, most likely discipline differently. Assuming you are comfortable with the way your nanny handles discipline, do not interfere when discipline is happening. If your child is trying to get your attention from the time out mat, ignore the behaviour or simply remind her it is between her and nanny and she is to work it out with her. Trust your nanny to be in charge and handle things well. It's why you hired her!
Be Flexible
Of course there are times when you will just want to join in on the fun for half an hour, or your child truly does need a mommy fix for a few moments, and that is perfectly okay. Be flexible, but keep the general boundaries clear to help you maintain the balance between your work, your child and her nanny.
Here are some more Suite 101 articles to help you out with the challenges of working from home:
How to Become a Work-at-Home Mom
